Inorganic Me

We come from two different worlds. I don’t mean the difference of geographical boundaries but that of thoughts. Not that of language but that of feelings. We could lay it on the way we have grown up, seen the world or experienced our journeys till now.

They say opposites attract. But is it relegated only to the gender or to the other facets in life also? If you look at one’s friends circle, then one sees that we are friends with like minded people in some way or the other. Yes there are those odd balls in that circle too but then most of us have a basic common ground which binds us together.

You say my life revolves around formula 1, movies and music. I never thought of it that way but then when I sat to think about it once I realised that yes at times I do like to surround myself with inanimate comfort factors as they take my pain away when I am bleeding. They don’t have the power to hurt, though if Ferrari loses it depresses me undoubtedly. I find solace in them when I have been pushed to the brink. And the latter happens as I am enormously emotional.

I don’t believe in losing or winning when it comes to love. Love is something where one just gives without any riders. If it’s reciprocated then you have found it. But if it’s not in the same intensity as yours does that mean you ought to stop loving that person? You still go on, don’t you? Because that love is yours and is not dependant on any external factors.

I am deficient in a lot of ways. Perhaps because of this no holds barred mentality of mine I have left myself open to the spears. And that’s why there are walls I have put up around me. It would take time to let the guards down. I did let them down last time around and I got badly bruised. I don’t want to go through that pain yet once again. I know it’s not fair on you but then this is me.

Passionate about life and love. Gleeful at one moment and break into torrents of tears in the other. Prankster to the core yet seriously philosophical. A single digit year trapped in doubles. Excessively expecting. Fantastically depressing. Intensely eccentric.

Am I bearable?

Protracting on the Momentary Lapse of Reason

Never knew that I would be placed in a position like this. But I alone have to bear this blame. After all I did have my misgivings but I overlooked them as I was in “love”. Incidentally so were you. Mine still persisted in spite of all the see-sawing life through at us. You took the shortcut out.

Not only satisfied with the shortcut, you indulged in also taking me hostage for unknown reasons. Was it just a fancy or you thought you should remind me of my past? Great going!!

Thought a scorpio by birth I have never indulged in the one hook that does come with the territory of the arthropod. I never stung. For the first time in my life I want to do that. And not to get back at you for all that you have done to me but just to make you feel just one ounce of that pain you have inflicted on me so erroneously. To tell you that I cannot love you anymore.